Top Gear madness, or just madness?

I'm having a slight identity crisis today. I've just realized that I have seen and enjoyed 13(!!) seasons of Top Gear... This frightening, if not rebarbative fact poses the question: "Why?" Why do I like it so much that I have seen 13 seasons of this petrol-head show? Why did I see two seasons of that wine tasting show even though I care about as preposterously little about fancy-pants wines as I do about the different types of trees they might have in Finland?
Behold! James May off of Top Gear was in that wine tasting program, being dry-humoured and weird and I absolutely loved it! Why? Are James May, Richard Hammond and Jeremy Clarkson hypnotizing me with some kind of Bugatti Veyron, "We-hate-the-Prius-because-it's-a-big-fat-fake-that-causes-just-as-much-pollution-as-a-supercar" aberration of my pink squishy thinker?

I read weird books about memory/thought-eating sharks made of letters and words; and books about films that never existed about houses with expanding and retracting hallways that slowly disintegrates everything inside it and disappear. I go to art museums and am a member of a film "club." I read Vogue! VOGUE damn it!

I don't even have a drivers licence. Well, that's not entirely true, a have a scooter licence that I got at school when I was sixteen and have never used. It rumbles the core of my thought-machine that I can find a show about cars this entertaining.

The kinds of people who watch the show voted THIS to be the best driving music of all time:

10 Fleetwood Mac "The Chain"
9 AC/DC "Highway to Hell"
8 Led Zeppelin "Immigrant Song"
7 Kenny Loggins "Danger Zone"
6 Motörhead "Ace of Spades"
5 Deep Purple "Highway Star"
4 Steppenwolf "Born to Be Wild"
3 Meat Loaf "Bat Out of Hell"
2 Golden Earring "Radar Love"
1 Queen "Don't Stop Me Now"
(I can't tell you why the list is the wrong way around, I simply copied it off Wikipedia, so take it up with the petrol-heads who wrote it. It should be noted that a Top Gear watching person/persons probably wrote this and thought it a grand and ingenious idea to have a descending list... A person with the mental capacity of a labradoodle in other words)

Just look at this ridiculous image:

Three middle-aged men (a dwars, a fat guy and the gay one), fast cars, massive explosions, sexism, dry humour and testosteronian stubbornness... Apparently this is what floats my boat!

Hare Krishna and I'll see you next season Top Gear!

Siren