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søndag 14. mars 2010

Ice flow, nowhere to go?



I'm little Johnny frostbite, but I'm about to do the only thing to escape the freeze: Go to Australia and Singapore! Five weeks of unlimited bliss. Owl-boy even got me a ticket to see The Go! Team. I do however have to get rid of my fear of babies to do my auntly duties in Australia. I tried watching cute baby-videos on youtube, but that just freaked me out and made me feel like a child-stalking pedophile. I'm not confident, but hopeful that I will end up the official living baby monitor for the red-headed bundle of joy and not be afraid to touch her little babyness. It will be green, warm and I will be scantly clothed!






My flight leaves at 0630AM tomorrow morning; wish me luck and a steady airplane with a sober pilot! And wish me the sun!



Hare Krishna

fredag 24. juli 2009

Travel


Doing some serious train riding tonight, I'll be in Bergen at 7am:(
At least I'm doing it in style: Carlberg, Raw Shark Texts, Stratos, a bunch of 17year olds getting drunk and playing cards and some weird old man staring non-stop at me....

Fun....

Hare Krishna

Siren

onsdag 8. april 2009

travel

Travel is a peculiar concept to me. I want to traverse all the worlds borders, go to any place that doesn’t have an airport, meet exiting people; I would especially like to meet Baba Ramdev and show him my incredible talent of not being able to touch my toes when I bend over, like an obese man with a beer gut able to hold his beer, fish & chips meal and his obese daughter on one lovable bump. But what we do nowadays is travel to get away. Get away from the monotony of work, school, family life and the like. Have we yet to realise that we don’t really get away from anything?

Whether you’re in (or on, I don’t know) Sunny Beach or the snowy slopes of the Alps, you’re still you! You can’t disconnect your brain when you’re on holiday. You still have your mobile and laptop (by necessity some would say) with you to keep in touch with the very place and life that you’re trying to get away from, if only for a week, ten days or maybe even two weeks. It’s not a sudden splurge of nomadic existence when you get off the plane in Magaluf. I believe there should be mandatory hard drugs on holidays, just too really get ones brainbox away from all the stress and troubles of our own constructed “reality” because we all know that drugs work better than a shitty hotel/beach/drinking binge in Sunny Beach. Alcohol does some of the job, but smoke some heroin or run around on a schizophrenic journey with a squirrel on crystal meth and the horrid reality of your dead end life will seem immensely inconsequential. That’s a real holiday; why isn’t that on the itinerary of all this mind numbing packaged holiday hoopla? I would be the first in line at that radical travel agency!

Hare fucking Krishna

Siren

lørdag 4. april 2009

London adventure

I have fallen profoundly in love with London, or more specifically Camden Town! A lot happens in a week and since I had at least a bottle of Jesus-juice every day, I can’t recollect every second of my trip. I can however humorously take you on a trip through a London that maxed out my credit card, forces me to hide from my land lord until I can scrape together some dosh and made me fall in love with many a man ludicrously similar to me (narcissism is a fickle lover, surpasses gender and embarrassing likeness)


I stayed in a wonderfully rustic “hotel” called The Camden Lock Hotel right next to a shockingly loud music club called BarFly. It looked exiting, but sadly I never set foot in it. A thing to know about living in Camden lock is that if you ever want to sleep, don’t live there… I however, did not want to sleep and therefore the hotel was perfect for me and my equally insane, drunkard friend Maria.

I did some shopping research for our trip. Research might be pushing it a bit; all I did was browse my fashion guru Susie Bubbles blog: http://www.stylebubble.co.uk/style_bubble/

My hearts desire was met both emotionally and shoppingly by Berty and Gerty Vintage (http://www.bertyandgerty.co.uk/cart.php) where I dribbled over agonisingly beautiful vintage stuff many a time; the second day I came there the preposterously attractive Australian merchant recognised me from the day before. I instantly fell in love with him and therefore blushed, stammered and lost all grasp of the English language in his presence. Still I bought a pair of black gentlemen’s shoes, a huge (fake) fur coal and Native American inspired belt.

I fell in love with many other nameless individuals in Camden Lock. A man with the facial hair of Eugene Hütz, every good-looking Britpop-grunger in tight jeans, a funny little man in a shoe shop and Scar in The Lion King (the musical).

This shop was only a small part of the wondrous universe of the Camden Lock markets where I laid down a Paris Hilton’esq amount of money on jewellery, T-shirts, artwork and general knickknack. I especially love my toy car ring and playmo broche!


We found a day to meander about Oxford Street. We did however not meander; we came up from the underground, found Top Shop to be a divine four floor haven of fashion. As we picked every intriguing garment in the shop, a lovely Top Shop lady came up to us and gave us access to the VIP section dressing rooms with a lounge, personal assistance, no queuing and a check out counter only used by the VIPs. I even overheard an annoying lady taking incessantly about her “friend” Kate (I assume she meant Moss) and about their children and how happy they where that they could now dress their fashionable kids in Top Shop outfits. Deep in the pit of my soul I suspect this lady used the celebrity name to get out of the exasperation of public dressing rooms and endless queues, but all she really needed to do was talk loudly in a foreign language, be about 5’10, slender and look a bit trendy.

One mind-boggling self-esteem enhancing occurrence happened while promenading Camden Lock where a man stopped me on the busy street and told me about this book he was writing about London or people in London and asked if he could take my picture to use in his book. I really had to struggle as not to bulge out in a Singing in the Rain spectacle with this new-found acclaim of my style. “We need a good background” he said charmingly like any ageing photographer/author would. He placed me in the middle of a car-riddled street while reassuring me that he would watch for cars. How one watches for cars while peering through a camera lens I have yet to comprehend, but I survived. The pictures didn’t come out great inasmuch as the evil Njord constantly blew the hair across my face and my pasty skin colouring being exactly as the colour of wall in the background. But I still choose to see it as a testimony to my stylishness even though a very similar outfit only ensued stares and giggles in Norway.

I also have a dating tip for Camden Town (if one enjoys immense amounts of attention): wear a cool hat. It gives people an excuse to strike up a conversation.
And don’t talk to men from York. They seem to massively dislike London and everything foreign, possibly except Scandinavian girls half their age…

We met many an intriguing character while in London. To my despair some of them where French; since my friend speaks French I spent most of the time they where around confused and attention deprived. So I spent my time talking to a flamboyantly gay Brit who must have beet intrigued my mannish apparel that evening seeing as how he came on to me.

I wish I could give you more of a Lonely Planet introduction to Camden Lock, but I cant for the life of me remember the names of the places we shopped and drank at.

BarTok is the Camden bar that has the longest drinking time (3am). Gerty and Berty Vintage and Stables market are by fare the best places to shop, and Oxford Street is the place to shop in the posh shops.


Go to London and love it like I do!

Hare Krishna

Siren
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